W.O.W. from a Filipina

Dear Ma'am Grace,

I just finished reading your book "TRUE LOVE WEDS" (after 2 nights of reading). And it was all WOW (Words of Wisdom) for me. Though I have read few books also about LOVE, yours is what appealed to me the most kasi ang author po ay kababayan ko at isang Filipina. Kahit papano nakakarelate ako sa mga settings at scene at takbo ng story knowing na ang bida ay isang Filipina na katulad ko.

From those authors (Joshua Harris, Eric and Leslie Ludy, Elisabeth Elliot) and YOU...it only says one thing: only GOD-CENTERED relationships could make a couple fulfilled and happy.

FOR NOW, I am also on the stage of "WAITING" while praying for the man that GOD would gave to me in HIS perfect time. I am hoping that in this "PRESENT WORLD" we live in, I would still find someone who will lovingly accept, understand and share the same convictions I have when it comes to relationship.

Thank you for sharing you VERY INSPIRING story.

I would love to share this book with a very good friend back home.

I am very much in awe of your love story,
Elvira C. Pintac

My Marriage Isn't Perfect

Once again I am faced with the fact that marriage and family life is precious. it is something God delights in. It is something we should care for, respect and protect.

My marriage isn't perfect. It's far from perfect. But it is a gift from God. When tough times hit, it's so easy for me to go back to God and complain. I complain about my current state, thinking that it was better and easier when I was single. i complain about the man God lovingly and graciously gave me as if I'm the most pitiful wife on earth. I guess all my ramblings are a result of my self-centeredness. Truth is, I want my husband to serve me. I expect him to meet my needs--every single one of them. I couldn't seem to accept it when Mang confessed that he can't always be strong for me. He can't meet all my needs. Worse was when he said that he also had needs; that he also looks to me to meet those needs though he doesn't expect me to be able to meet each one of them. I wasn't sure I wanted to hear it. I felt burdened and weighed down. I didn't want to serve. I wanted to be served, to be pampered. Afterall, I deserve it!

Lies. Of course these were all lies. My selfishness got the better of me. And so I started to become discontented. I looked at what others have and got envious. I complained more and praised less. I worried more and prayed less. I criticized my husband more and appreciated him less. No wonder happiness in each day eludes me.

(After writing this, I prayed for Mang. I asked God to forgive me for my selfishness. Then I wrote the "100 things I thank God for my husband list". It was a good exercise. I have a better perspective of things now...)

From Frustration to Thanksgiving: 100 Things I Thank God for My Husband

Journal Entry for Sept 3, 2006

Tonight I poured out my frustrations about Mang to You, God. And You responded by telling me to list down 100 things I ‘m thankful for Mang. Here it goes…

God, thank you for giving me Mang who is…

1. faithful (never looked at or took interest in other women since we got engaged)
2. honest (didn’t hide his past, his place of origin, his flaws, his family’s defects, etc.)
3. fun-loving (can’t be overcome by problems because he knows how to have fun)
4. loves my parents and sister
5. loves Lian Ed
6. loves me
7. affectionate (physical touch is his love language)
8. has a heart for others
9. genuinely helps without expecting anything
10. seeks what’s best for our family
11. God-fearing
12. missions-oriented
13. proud of his tribal roots
14. takes his roles in life seriously (ie. husband, father, eldest son, brother)
15. intelligent
16. athletic
17. handy man (good carpenter, engineer and architect, though he is an amateur)
18. relational (easy to get along with)
19. supportive of my ventures, writing and art
20. musically inclined
21. modest…sometimes too modest at the expense of his own advancement
22. obedient and respectful son
23. bold and courageous
24. passionate (in every aspect of life)
25. caring and thoughtful
26. gives me flowers even if there’s no occasion
27. wants to pursue higher education
28. never forgets to look back to where he came from
29. tries his best to provide for our needs
30. appreciates and enjoys my cooking
31. good driver
32. sings well and plays the guitar well
33. unashamed and unapologetic of who he is
34. committed
35. a man of his word
36. unafraid to shed tears
37. laughs a lot
38. good physique
39. technocrat
40. dreams big
41. enjoys taking a break, watching movies, or going for a massage
42. true friend (not just to me) and hardly has enemies
43. isn’t jealous
44. doesn’t hit me; not violent
45. gentle in bed; doesn’t force me when I am not ready or not in the mood
46. very secure of himself (doesn’t feel insecure of my achievements)
47. finishes what he puts his mind to
48. gives me space; respects my personal bubble
49. gives me freedom to pursue my dreams
50. dedicated to his work
51. speaks for others
52. thinks before acting
53. careful not to “step on others’ toes”
54. a friend to my friends
55. relates well with my relatives
56. encourager
57. took care of me while I was pregnant and after I gave birth
58. gives others a second chance
59. gracious
60. knows how to choose his battles
61. calls a spade a spade
62. enjoys the moment (lives in the here and now)
63. doesn’t hold a grudge
64. gets over his anger easily
65. forgiving
66-67doesn’t act on something unless he’s sure of it, however he’s also a risk-taker
68. not selfish
69. servant-heart
70. not boastful and arrogant
71. sacrifices for others
72. goes with me to the grocery
73. occasionally babysits
74. allows me to have fun with the girls
75. gives me allowance for "kakikayan"
76. unafraid to admit when he doesn’t know something
77. unashamed to ask for help when he doesn’t know what to do
78. child-like (not childish)
79. a good writer when in the mood
80. Lian Ed’s favorite playmate
81. my number one fan
82. good hugger
83. good kisser
84. appreciative
85. expressive
86. stable
87. knows how to turn me on
88. goes to concerts with me even if he gets bored
89. good shopper (better than me)
90. holds our little “treasury” well
91. shares his thoughts and feelings with me
92. mature
93. sensible
94. practical
95. particular about hygiene
96. determined to make our marriage work
97. obeys and loves God
98. steps out in faith
99. the one I share dreams, visions and life with
100. my partner in life.

What more can I ask for? There is really nothing to complain about!

Thank you, God for my husband!!!